Tag Archives: self worth

Quitting Social Media

Where I am most of the time and where will I be for most days to come will be on this straight road of here and there trying to make some ends meet.

For the time being, I deactivated most of my social media accounts beacause it’s causing me pain seeing memories of the past and let’s face the truth… you are annoyed seeing people posting some senseless thoughts and wished you did something more productive other than scrolling on your feeds. Right… you can actually adjust your news feeds settings as what Facebook suggested but is it really worth adjusting it for almost a thousand friends on your lists? To unfollow each and every one of them? I’d rather write something instead of scrolling to death, like how social media controls some part of your brain not to do anything but just to stare at your phone…

First day of deactivating my Facebook account has gone by and if you ask me how it feels like? Liberating… that’s the word. I am currently on 2nd day streak and how I feel about it now? …ooops, I forgot that I disabled my Facebook app (uninstall wasn’t an option for my phone ..duhh) and I don’t see it now when I open my phone. I replaced those medias by… LINE Webtoon, Spotify, Chrome and WordPress apps just to name a few on what’s on my screen… Don’t judge LOL…

But what’s really my turning point for deactivating and disabling Facebook, Twitter and Instagram? Surely you now ask what is it… Well, people change feelings change friendships change and I need to change too in order to survive, adapt and fight and I hope that explains a bit. I am growing up period.

There’s a lot going on in my life right now and some shenanigans I need to brush off, yes I am still learning the process…

One of my Managers told me that I am so expressive and yes I am that expressive social type of a person, totally agree with that… no questions asked. It was then I realized that I really am that kind of person. You see, you read it, I just wrote that I am an expressive type but never had I imagined how true it was until my Manager told me so, straight and no reservations.

I have better control of my brain now for the most part and hoped to have a better control of my plans next, kind of exciting actually…

Re-constructed Irish

So I’m back in blogging with whatever thoughts I come across to… It has been half a year ever since I pulled over and stopped expressing every feeling, every thoughts, everything…

Honestly speaking, I was drowned in love just like that. Everything had been put in to test, no I did not want to detail every single tear I shed, no I did not want to think about the pain I went through but yes I am living with all the good things being in love resulted me in to. Of course it was sweet but highly to be maintained, no time for slip ups and tiny errors otherwise it would be a mess, there was surely a war.

Sometimes, being selfish brings our ego up high and admittedly one of the good feelings yet to be guarded at all times, what comes around goes around. Selfishly in love was one of the things that controlled me where I want was just me and no one else, I was not sure if I was influenced or was it just really me. It was difficult, it was overwhelming, it was a beautiful kind of hurting.

I found myself reading blogs and articles hoping I could find the answer and better understand why in the world this is happening to me, why in the world everything has to be out of place and out of hands. Then I stopped for a while and listened to my inner self, I was wanting to do a lot, I was wanting to do everything I want at the same time and then I blew up never redeemed myself for a while.

I know I needed a break and I needed a space but things just keep moving on and so I had to. You know the feeling when you notice yourself aging and looked back behind with what have you done in your life you were most proud of? Have you had enough savings? Have you had enough of everything? I think I grew up too fast…

I never understood the magic of Law Of Attraction anyways, I watched the documentary yes, I heard what they said yes, tried to apply it in my life yes, but nothing succeeded and found myself trying hard for something I was really not. There was no harm in trying right? If it’s for your own worth, why not?

But this is me… No matter what people think, whether they say I care less… I am entitled to my own feelings and I am entitled to my own actions.