When Maturity Sets In

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Peer pressures were everywhere, depends on how you would entertain it. Influences, whether good or bad, up to you on how you would perceive it to be. High school was when I first started writing essays and poems. High school was when I started receiving commendations from what I wrote but criticisms were always being at their best. I’m not a keeper for things; I learned and forget not-so-good memories from someone, I threw away things not-so-worth-remembering because even things could be out of place, if you really have the sense of keeping the value, it’s going to be written in your memory intact.

My first critic for my first poem was my brother. Should he be hurting my feelings when I should be expecting some moral support? I was passive; I forgot what he had told me, how bad it was and how I felt on my first feedback. It was a love poem, it was for someone I like but liked someone else. I went on with my poem and essay writing but I never let it publicized in school because everyone in class hated me. That’s when I started to choose friends very carefully. That’s when I realized the real value of fewer but real friends.

Being too much flexible, I compromised my academics and teachers started ignoring me since my performance was not above average anymore when I met my laid-back friend. No biggie for me why I chose to be with her because if not with her, I wouldn’t be confident enough to express my feelings and to stand strong whenever I needed to. That’s what I didn’t learn in school.

I knew I was good in singing back then so I started to dream of being a singer and encourage myself to join a group for singing in school but still I failed to do so. I got rejected but that didn’t stop me to dream big, although I endure the rejection at some point. Honestly, my singing talent developed gradually when I started singing songs from: Taylor Dayne, Debbie Gibson, Tiffany and other artists from the 80’s including Celine Dion, Mariah Carey and more. High school life had a lot to offer but not for me since I pretty much didn’t like what I went through before. Rejections and fears, love and hatred, I met some of the “plastics” in school and had to deal with them till we graduated in ’06.

I wasn’t able to enjoy my entire college life because as you may know, I haven’t finished my degree yet but now I’m on the process of going back to school. Dreams I had before are still a dream and right now I’m dreaming to be a writer apparently so I started out blogging and writing every point of view that I know will be worth it. I also got criticisms in writing so I listened to them, not taking it seriously though.

Now that I’m working, I knew I had to learn more and will still go through a lot of things whether it may do me any good or not I wouldn’t mind. A big thanks to my mentors and supervisors, although they won’t pay me much at least I learned a lot from them and respectively correcting me when I’m being stubborn.

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